Remedy
by KarrineGenesis
Summary: Cori Giselde was an ordinary girl in our world, before she is attacked by a giant mutant Angel demon thing and gets all 3 voices of Deadpool stuck in her head. Will she be able to get them out before the whole world goes down in flames? 4th wall breaks, Language, sexual innuendo. Deadpool/OC.
1. Prologue

**(Blah): Funny, crazy voice in Deadpool's head.**

**[Blah]: Serious voice in Deadpool's head.**

**-Blah-: Deadpool.**

***Blah*: Cori when talking with the Deadpools in her head.**

Some say our lives are planned out even before we are born.

Some say our fate is down to our abilities and mentality.

And I suppose, there are those who believe that it is due to a combination of both.

But quite frankly, I think it's all down to sheer dumb luck.

I could never explain what happened that night, in the dark of night, shrouded in the hood that my boyfriend, Gregory, had given me before he had died so many years ago.

The shadows were lightly dancing across my face as the cold bit into my exposed skin, and I had to close my eyes as the wind picked up slightly.

Suddenly, there was this sound. Panic gripped my heart and I stopped, just listening.

When the noise came again, I turned to watch. There stood a man in a white suit, wings spread from his back, one white, one black. Little horns were on his head, and his eyes were an orange that reminded me of my mother's pumpkin pie.

He stepped forward, and my fight or flight response decided to kick in. My body turned, running the other way.

Suddenly, something thin and metallic had curled itself around my waist, digging into my skin.

Pain roared to life all over my body, before everything went black.

Now, readers, this story gets sorta crazy from here. What? You thought it was crazy before? You must be out of your damn mind. Let's get to 3rd person. Maybe that'll explain this messed up sh*t.

(3rd person)

The young woman with cherry red/brown hair and dark green eyes lay motionless on the stark white of the carpet in her apartment, where she mysteriously appeared.

Her name is Cori Giselde.

As she started to stir awake, something tried speaking in her mind.

She lazily opened her eyes and groaned as pain pounded through her head. Damn, how did she get there?

(Do you remember the angel devil dude?)

Cori gasped and bolted up when she heard a strangely familiar voice, staying stock still and looking around.

No one?

[Well, yes and no. We're inside your head.]

Cori jumped again at the next voice, and then realization washed across her face.

-Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner!-

**OK, so that's the prologue. Will continue, don't worry. I just have to continue writing Lies (Lila) for Invader Zim. There will be a sequel to this where Cori goes into their world, but I won't spoil any major plot points for you. Favorite, follow, REVIEW!**


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**(Blah): Funny, crazy voice in Deadpool's head.**

**[Blah]: Serious voice in Deadpool's head.**

**-Blah-: Deadpool.**

***Blah*: Cori when talking with the Deadpools in her head.**

**Yeah, I'm starting the next chapter! Plus, I may add the X-Men and/or the Avengers in later. Plus, the plot is going to get more prominent soon! And I've already written the ending. Yes, but not everything in between. I got bored. And it's the ending of the first part. The second part is Poison. And I am so sorry for not updating. It's been a long month…**

Cori stood stock still in the middle of her living room, listening to the silence that was now surrounding her.

"Deadpool?"

-You need pouches, weapons. Do you have any tacos?-

Cori shut her eyes and growled slightly.

[What's wrong now?]

Cori went into the kitchen and opened the door.

(Cool, we have breasts!)

Suddenly, Cori's hands moved of their own accord and went up to grasp at her boobs.

Cori turned red and yanked her arms down.

"Deadpool!"

-What, sweetheart?-

"Why are you in my head, and why did you use my arms?"

(Cause we only have breasts for a little while!)

"Cori."

Cori yelped in surprise and turned to look at her new husband, Max.

They hadn't been married for long.

They had met right after Gregory had died 4 years ago. Max had been at the funeral, and they had dated for 3 hellish years before Max made her get married to him.

Max was an abusive bastard who only cared about himself, and how much money he was getting from Cori.

-Who is that?-

Cori cast her eyes down slightly, watching the floor. "Yes Max?"

Deadpool listened intently as he tried to comprehend what was happening, then snapped backward when Max went forward and grabbed Cori by her forearms.

"Cori, you were late. Where were you?" He growled, almost a demand, not a question.

"I don't know." She whispered truthfully.

Then Max's hand was in the air, and when the slapping sound resounded through the room, Deadpool hardened, and took over.

Cori came to in a boat, water lapping onto the side of it. Blood covered her, not her blood, and a backpack sat against her, and she moaned in pain as the harsh light burned in her eyes.

"Deadpool…. What the hell happened?"

-You don't have a problem with that abusive bastard anymore.-

"Damnit, Diet Mountain Dew."

(Um…. What?)

"It's a song. Fuck, where are we?"

[Somewhere safe. Isn't that enough?]

"No." Cori stood in the boat and promptly puked over the side when the boat swayed dangerously.

[Something wrong?]

"I get sea sick." Cori shut her eyes and let the rocking get pushed to the back of her mind, willing her nausea away. Music started in her pocket and she cocked an eyebrow. "What?"

"From the top and the bottom, the bottom to the top. It's all good if the party don't stop. From the top and the bottom, the bottom to the top. All y'all bitches better take another shot!"

Cori quickly grabbed her phone and answered the call. "Hello?"

"_Cori, oh my god, you answered! Where the hell have you been?! It's been 3 days!" _Her mother's voice cried from the phone.

Cori face palmed.

*Seriously, 3 fucking days?*

-Hey, we were saving you!-

"I'm sorry mom."

"_You should be sorry! Where are you?!" _Cori looked around her. There was a river, she realized, and then she also realized exactly where they- no, she was. She was just a little insane, Deadpool wasn't in her mind!

(Yes we are~!)

"Oh my fucking lord. I'm in the Arkansas river."

How had she got from Oregon to Oklahoma?

-We found something awesome out! You have our powers!-

Cori promptly fainted.

-Remedy-

Wade slowly stood, wobbly on Cori's legs. "So, I still have my healing factor, still have my flexibility and strength, I even have the satchel with all my unlimited weapons! Cori can now speak all my languages, teleport, drive everything from golf carts to spaceships, make holographic disguises, and can break the fourth wall! Which reminds me! I NEED REVIEWS! NNNNNEEEEEEDDDD THEM!" He yelled, jumping up and down in the boat. The backpack he had put on bounced on his back harshly, and the boat moved dangerously side to side.

"Oh no, the boobs weigh me down!" He cried, stumbling.

(But they're so fun to touch!)

[I wouldn't.]

Wade brought the boat to the side of the river, got out, and slipped the phone into Cori's pocket, ending the call.

*Deadpool, what are you doing?*

Wade shrugged. "Getting food, drinks, something." He fixed the backpack and trekked towards the nearest city, which happened to be Tulsa, Oklahoma.

He looked around before pushing the door open to the nearest restaurant he saw. The warm smell hit his nose and he breathed in. It almost felt… nice, not being a mercenary and killing people every other day.

"What would you like, miss?" Wade cocked an eyebrow at the woman on the other side of the counter, then realized he was still in Cori's body.

"Pie." Wade blinked in surprise, then understood that Cori had said that, with her body.

"Alright ma'am, just sit and tell me which you would like."

"I'll take the pumpkin pie, please." Cori said, and Wade nearly rolled his eyes- well, Cori's eyes.

This was getting confusing. The woman nodded and left.

*Well, what's the plan, Deadpool?*

-The plan is backpack to New York and find the rift to get me back to my world.-

Cori thought a moment, then asked, *Can I come with you?*

Wade stopped. He really froze. –No, you have people and things here.-

*The hell I do! I have nothing for me here.* She answered, him, and then it went silent.

The pie was produced, and Wade gave the woman the money she wanted, before starting to eat.

*I'm coming with you.*

-Yeah, we'll see.-

**I'll try and update soon. Thank you for reading! I kind of blurted this out so you guys have something, even though it's short. Favorite, follow, review.**


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